Co-worker is out for the week, so I have a pile of stuff in front of me. Nasty stuff. I also had a backlog of e-mail, a backlog of NWC messages, and I haven’t read my LJ Friends page in an aeon. Basically: A lot of stuff sort of fell aside while I was slothing around the apartment in my pajamas watching DVDs.
I got nothing done during my week long chunk of free time. Not a thing. No creative work. Not much RP. I did a lot of movies, I did some socializing, that’s all good, but… I’ve got nothing really to show for it at the end of the week and now it’s back to the routine. I just couldn’t get into the right frame of mind to do any creative work — as usual.
If I’m not producing something I’m not happy, that’s the long and short of it, stupid as it may be. I know I should be thrilled just to enjoy passive/consumptive experiences like watching DVDs but something in me is hardwired to PRODUCE, and I can’t resist that.
That wouldn’t be much of a problem if not for the fact that I’m not only creative stifled but tied up in two epics right now (UE and PR) which I haven’t made any progress on. Nothing hurts more than knowing that something’s left undone, particuarly something huge and public, with others waiting and wanting more. At least with EE it was a one-shot, something I could theoretically finish or drop without any hassle. I WANT to finish both UE and PR, but they just look more and more insurmountable as dry, uncreative gulch days roll on…
I don’t know what to do.