New readers — welcome! This blog is where I set up feedback threads for the latest draft story in progress. Every week, I post new scenes! Right now I’m up to story #9. You should probably start at story #1, though.
Current readers — We continue today with handful of new scenes, but they’re meaty ones indeed, continuing the twin tales of Jonny’s band and Penelope’s new life scenario. There’s even a cameo from an old friend!
I may be doing some revisions to these later, but not to drastically skew the plot in a new direction. What I need is more character description. I’m terrible at that, because it never feels like the right moment to step back and do some vivid depiction of a character; you need another character observing them, and you need the narrator bound to the observer, or it feels awkward. But without that, you lose an important attachment to the character, who otherwise is only a name and a pile of dialogue lines.
For instance, Ellie has no description yet despite this being a key scene (her introduction). Similarly, Destiny (who shows up in Penelope’s story) is one of the few persons of color I’ve put in the series, but that’s barely acknowledged. I always regretted making Cass white; that was a perfect opportunity, one which I will talk about in the author annotations to 004, which you can read in the Kickstarted City of Angles book! $$PLUG$$
Something to think about, anyway. Meanwhile we’ve got all sorts of story busting out all over, and I’d love to hear your reactions and ponderances! Things really heat up when we move into Act 2 next week — when we have our first real-world celebrity cameo APPROVED by the celebrities in question!