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Florida

I'm jotting down some quick notes based on my recent craziness in the Florida area -- Also known as "America's wang," although I'm fairly certain that was intended just as a joke and not a state slogan. It's hard to tell when digging through old media.

Florida has recently (last fifty years or so) become a sort of haven for young and hip elves who reject the traditional and ancient ways of their ancestors, and embrace human culture. Recovered human technology and rebuilt human cities are the goal, but given the state of disrepair these things have fallen into (nature reclaims its turf amazingly fast) Faerie magic is used to patch up the cracks. The result is a weird amalgam which largely retains human shape, but may have something totally different under the hood.

They also seem to have Internet access, although as of this writing, I'm not entirely sure HOW given the nearest wireless access points are up in Georgia and other parts of Eastusa.

One thing I would like to visit at some point when I'm not in the middle of taking the Ring of Power to Mt. Doom is the Temples of the Mouse. These comprise a series of what looks like amusement parks, although there's been some debate as to whether they were intended to thrill, educate, or indoctrinate humans into some kind of consumer-driven faith. The only thing the elves agree on is not to call them by their True Names... legends speak of hordes of vicious legal arbiters who descend upon anyone who violates the Great Mouse's manyfold trademarks. You don't grow up a Faerie without having a certain amount of respect and fear for that kind of binding agreement.

EDITOR'S NOTE: FLORIDA UBER ALLES! I've wandered all over this great land of ours, but I keep coming back here. This is where my heart yearns to be, wherever it may roam. This is the hood where my peeps hang in my crib.

I'm not majorly involved in the rebuilding and settlement process; too much of a wandering spirit for that. But I do know the right hands to shake and the right parties to go to. If you need a Florida tour guide, I'm your elf.

One thing I should point out that Emily didn't mention is that it's not like the entire state is occupied by right-thinking Faerie-Americans. There's plenty in the panhandle area, closer to Summer Court turf like New Orleans, who run the opposite direction and embrace every tradition they can. No one group has any one mindset, any one moral compass. You'll find variety everywhere. But isn't that the American way, yo?

copyright 2009 stefan gagne